Mastering the Mindset
Mastering the Mindset
You and Discomfort: How Challenges Fuel Personal Growth
What happens when the safety net is pulled out from under you? Let's talk about the impact of embracing discomfort and challenges. We know that it leads to personal growth. Yet rarely do we seek the discomfort that fosters it. Growth depends on our ability to face and conquer challenges. Sometimes we have to break free from our comfort zones in order to come out stronger and more resilient. Let's talk about it. Oh...and more unreleased music for you too!
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What's up everybody and thank you for listening to Mastering the Mindset. My name is Darius Dodge and I'm an actor, hip-hop artist and fitness and life coach, and I'm here to personally help you train and improve your mindset so that you can, one, become the best version of yourself mentally and, two, gain focus and motivation to be able to take action and achieve the success in life that you want and deserve. Before we get started, please like and subscribe to my channel and at the end of this episode, if you liked it, please share it with a friend or a loved one or someone who would benefit from hearing this message. I'm so glad you're here and I'm ready to go on this journey with you, and that journey begins now. That journey begins now. All right, and welcome back to another episode. Thank you all so much for being here. Like I always say, if you are watching on YouTube, please like and subscribe to the channel. If you were listening to me on a podcast platform, you know what to do. Leave a review Bars. Both of those greatly help me out and help me me keep this thing going. Also, make a donation. Those also are greatly appreciated and also help me keep this thing going. Before we get started.
Speaker 1:Man, I'm excited for y'all to hear the song I got for y'all today. I do have some new music and I gotta say and I know I've said this before but I literally think this is the best artistically, lyrically, piece of art music I have ever done in my life. Literally, I'm listening to this music, man, and it's I'm damn near tearing up because it just it's so good and I'm excited to show the world this is, um, um, what's the word for it? This is it's not complete, it's like a rough draft, right, I have to send it back to the person to make a few minor tweaks, tweaks that probably only I would recognize. But you get the gist of it. The song is pretty much done, but it's so amazing. Anyway, let's jump into this podcast and don't fast forward. I know you want to Don't fast forward. This ain't going't fast forward. I know you want to Don't fast forward. This ain't gonna be a long one. Just sit and wait and then hear the song. But here we go. So I'm glad you're tuning in today.
Speaker 1:Let's talk about growth and as you seek to become the person you want to be and all the things you have to go through in life, all the good, all the bad, the hardships, the triumphs, and how they make you who you are and how they foster growth, with all the things you have to go through. And to give you a comparison of what I'm talking about, I'm going to use a lobster as my example and if you know about lobsters besides them being delicious and expensive you know that a lobster's shell is hard and the shell is called an exoskeleton and the actual animal, the lobster itself, is actually soft and the outer shell protects the lobster. That is the hard thing the shell and the shell itself actually never grows, it never gets bigger. So how does the lobster grow if the shell doesn't get bigger? Well, the lobster on the inside of the shell is a thing that grows and what happens is the lobster. The lobster goes through its growth and it squeezes up against the outer shell. It's going through a lot of pressure, squeezes up against the outer shell, it's going through a lot of pressure, it's going through the discomfort of being too big for its exoskeleton and it knows that it's time to shed that outer shell and eventually it breaks through and sheds it. And, of course, when it does this, it's vulnerable because, again, the lobster itself is soft, so it has to go hide under rocks or between rocks or in holes, whatever. And while it's hiding its new exoskeleton, its new shell is growing and it's hardening and the lobster is getting ready to be able to safely come out of hiding again. And this new shell that the lobster has is actually bigger and harder than the last shell it had. And the more and more a lobster grows, the bigger and harder that shell gets. So if you ever see a really really big lobster, that shell is really really hard way harder than a younger lobster shell. And every time it grows a larger exoskeleton it's harder than the last one, which means it's even harder for the lobster to get out of that shell, to grow out of it, because every every time it grows it takes that much more energy, it's that much harder to break through that shell. And this happens over and over and over again until the lobster dies.
Speaker 1:And each time this growth requires stress and discomfort. Stress and discomfort that's how it grows, and you obviously know where I'm going with this analogy. But this is exactly how it works for us. In order for us to, we have to go through stress and discomfort. Now, do we want to go through stress and discomfort. Nope, nobody wants that Absolutely not. But in life we have to, and we have to actually seek that discomfort. That discomfort is what's going to break out of, break us out of our shell, out of our comfort zone, and provide us with the growth that we want.
Speaker 1:Because when you push yourself and when you get pushed to your limits, to a place that's uncomfortable, that's stressful, it forces you to grow mentally as well. Your brain will never be the same. You just went through something that was hard and you came out on the other side stronger, and we have to understand that if we sit in our shell and our comfort zone forever until we die, we'll never grow. We never will. You'll never get bigger. You have to seek discomfort and you have to do things that will make you uncomfortable in order to have growth. When you realize life is starting to get uncomfortable, that don't mean it's time to run away from it. It's actually time to run towards that. And as you grow, each time you push yourself, it's going to be harder and harder. Each time something is a challenge for you, that challenge is going to be harder and harder, but at the same time, the flip side of it is. Each time you go through it, you get even bigger and stronger.
Speaker 1:On the other side of it, think about the hardest thing you've ever done. The hardest thing you've ever gone through. Bring that up in your mind right now. The hardest thing you've ever done whether it was the death of a loved one or being the brokest you've ever been in your life Maybe you were homeless. Maybe it was having to speak in front of a bunch of people. Maybe it was a job that you hated, that you were stuck in. Maybe it was a bad marriage. Whatever it is, think about how hard that time was. Now and I know you probably got several examples. For me it's a few things, but kind of a combination of them all I had this stupid thing on my criminal record.
Speaker 1:Long story short, I put some trash bags in a dumpster of an apartment that I didn't live in. I was charged with a felony for illegal dumping. I had a public defendant that offered me a plea, a plea deal, and the plea was theft by swindle, which, me being in college, I had no idea what that meant. I just knew it was a misdemeanor instead of a felony. So, of course, right out of college, I took the plea deal and right out of college my business administration minor was useless. I could not find an office job. I got turned down by Wells Fargo because of it, which would have been a full time job, which meant I wouldn't have time for theater. Then I had a job as a security officer at General Mills and the only shift they had available was like the second or third shift, which meant I couldn't do theater because I didn't have my nights free. But I ended up getting a DWI and lost that job because I was in jail over the weekend and couldn't make my shifts. And that's when it really got hard for me.
Speaker 1:I was working temp jobs, the labor kind, the ones where you show up at like six o'clock in the morning and hope they have some work to send you out on. And it was only labor work Like. One of the jobs I had was to move furniture out of a house that the state had either condemned or this family lost the home or something. But man, when I tell you this was like being on an episode of Hoarders, literally like being on an episode of Hoarders. That house was crazy, I swear. I don't know where they slept. Food was everywhere rotten. Anyway, that's the kind of jobs I had, because that's all I could find. I would have to show up early as hell in the morning see if they had work available and if they did, they sent you out on the job with no guarantee of a full day's work. It was minimum wage, so less than $9 an hour at that time.
Speaker 1:So I was broke, not doing theater, which is what my degree is, which is what my degree is in, which is what I love to do, my passion, and I'm working a job that I hated because I had something on my record that kept me from getting an office job. But you know what industry don't do background checks, theater, and thank God I was out there auditioning my ass off and meeting people and trying to get my name out there. I mean, I was showing up to auditions that I had no business at, plays that didn't have any black characters, and things have changed now. Now it's normal to do plays that don't follow the race of a character on the page right, they are more progressive in the theater community, but not back then, and I showed my black ass up anyway and I didn't care how they looked at me when I walked in that door.
Speaker 1:I did what I had to do and it forced growth. It forced me out of my comfort zone, which was my fallback plan with my business minor. If I didn't find work in theater, I can get an office job. That was my plan, that was my life plan. Well, that got taken away from me. I didn't have that crutch and it forced me to grow and I have had a great theater career. I'm loving what I do and where I'm at.
Speaker 1:But it took me having to go through some hard times. It was a requirement and I know that if I would have got that job, making that good money at Wells Fargo Well, what I thought was good money back then, the most I ever made at that point If I would have took that job, theater would have been on the back burner for me. I wouldn't have been able to do it and I know you have your own story about things that you've been through and how it made you stronger. I made made you a better version of yourself. Because here's the thing People can talk about you, they can lie on you, they can talk behind your back, but nothing they do is going to be worse than what you've already been through and it's no coincidence. It made you grow.
Speaker 1:That discomfort made you grow and this is why you need to seek it. You need to strategically put yourself in conditions that will foster growth and you have to be pushing yourself by putting yourself outside of your comfort zone as much as you can seek that discomfort, no-transcript. So next time something happens to you whether it's something that you go and seek or whether it's something that actually happens to you, some life event, something you can't get around, like a death, or you lose your job or somebody gets sick, whatever it may be Next time that hard thing happens to you, don't think of it that way. Think of it happening for you. That is pushing you because you've been too stagnant, and this is something that we really need to pay attention to. When something really catastrophic happens in our lives, a lot of times it's because we're being stagnant stagnant in life, we're not trying to grow or get better or push ourselves, and then boom, life throws something at us and it shifts us, our mindset, the way we do things. We have to adapt and make changes, and those changes are what helped us grow. And this is how the universe works right, how life works If you look back and think about the major life events in the past that caused you to make a change, and now you're better because of it. If you think back and look how you operated back, then you probably would be. You probably were being stagnant. You wasn't focused on growth or trying to get better. You were just living life, doing you not a care in the world.
Speaker 1:One of the things that happened to me that I'm so thankful for, by the way, is I got a DWI, and I'm so grateful for that for a couple of reasons. Like I said earlier, I lost my job because of it my job as a security guard for General Mills, which, which was taking me away from theater. And two, it made me have to make a change because I was way too comfortable with drinking and driving Way too comfortable. I remember waking up in my bed the next morning after going out to a club and not even remembering how I got home After going out to a club and not even remembering how I got home. Or I remember having to struggle to stay awake behind the wheel some nights, like I was really doing that, struggling to keep my eyes open while driving home because I was drunk and I kept doing that until finally I got arrested for it. I got pulled over, went to jail for the weekend, lost my job, had to go through some hard times, but thank God I did, because I could have killed myself or, worse, somebody else, and it changed me for the better and I know you got a story like mine.
Speaker 1:Maybe it's time for you to, instead of being stagnant and complacent and on autopilot, maybe it's time for you to seek some discomfort to prepare yourself forward, to prepare your life forward yourself and not the universe, not life doing it for you the hard way. Because when you see the kind of discomfort I'm talking about, it ain't life altering and it won't hurt as much Pushing yourself outside your comfort zone. The comfort of not putting in extra work on your side hustle, or the comfort of knowing that you don't do well public speaking and you stray away from it and you never get better at it, instead of putting yourself in those positions to have to do it, even if it's something small and minor, right. The comfort of not sacrificing a few hours of sleep for a few months as you go back to night school and finish that degree. The comfort of saying I'll do it tomorrow or next week, when you said the same things yesterday and last week. When you said the same things yesterday and last week. The comfort of procrastinating. The comfort of knowing you want to grow your social media but you don't want to step outside your comfort zone and get in front of your camera. The comfort of not actively working on yourself.
Speaker 1:Because one of the main mistakes folks make when they go after a goal or they think about the life they want to live, they make the mistake of staying the exact same and then they get upset about the results they didn't get from the work they didn't do. We get upset about the results we didn't get from the work we didn't do and your comfort zone is robbing you of achieving those results. Most of us know what we need to do to move the needle forward in life. We at least have an idea, if we're being honest about it. We know what we need to do, what we know what we need to do, what we need to do more of, what we need to do less of. We know the amount of effort we need to pull it off, but in the back of our minds, the part of our brains that we don't articulate out loud is that it's going to take work. It's going to require us to be uncomfortable. So we sit and we sit and we sit. Can you push yourself, can you seek that discomfort that's going to help you get outside your comfort zone so you can become the person you need to be, because to get where you want to go, you're going to have to start being a version of yourself that still needs to be realized, that needs to be finessed, that needs to be groomed and built up. Being comfortable and being stagnant will keep that version of yourself buried. So that's what I got for you today.
Speaker 1:Thank you all for being here. Like I always say, please leave a donation, make a donation. I left links in the description of this video on how to do that. On YouTube, please like and subscribe, and on a podcast platform, please leave a review. All of these things are much appreciated and greatly help me out.
Speaker 1:So let's get to this song. It is unreleased. You are the first ones to hear it. Like I said, I appreciate y'all being in my community, so whenever I do anything new, you get it first. So the name of this song is called On God Freestyle. On God Freestyle, and let's ride out On God, on God.
Speaker 1:I ain't even go waste time and take time putting a watch on On God. Yeah, gotta have patience. Yeah, I'm Daniel with the lions, I'm David with Goliath. Ain't no caveman in the Bible. My evolution been God sent. No, I'm not a guy, but I'm an idol.
Speaker 1:A lot of y'all been committing sins just for a chance to go viral Reading my new scriptures, ready for my crucifixion, like that. Y'all thought you was a Christian. Yeah, I'm waiting for one of y'all to catch the first stone. Oh God, that charged me up. It feel like it's a birthstone. Did I push a button? Well, speak up like a chirp phone, but you gotta send an email, cause my cell phone been my work phone.
Speaker 1:Oh God, I dive off a deep end, like walking a plank or Noah's Ark For anybody that's close to my heart. Watch where them serpents all in your garden. Listen to them with caution. They whispering all kind of lies and acting like they holy. You would think they could walk on water. That's Antichrist. Don't bother. Give sacrifice for your dreams. What is you really willing to offer him? Yeah, the heavenly father. Please forgive me, I have sinned Questions I don't comprehend.
Speaker 1:Why do good people gotta have it so bad they going to war. But then guess, I never know. You suspect me one time. What happened the second? I pray I never know. Keep my guard up high. You're trying to treat my wall like Jericho. Another question I never know, like how can I possibly do it all and be fine that you be thinking you got on your mind? You can't do miracles all of the time, and why do your water keep turning to wine? Yeah, on God, your hard work pay off Might not be actually right. Gotta make sure you attacking it right. Excuse me, I didn't ask for advice. I'm doing me. That's on God. I'm doing this with the passion of Christ. I pray they don't cross me. Lord, please keep them off my back with a knife.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I don't want to be God, but I've been acting like Christ Because he was a carpenter. I want to build. I'm too old school. Yeah, I got old testament tendencies. Yeah, my brothers will never be my enemies. Yeah, we will never be Canaanite, but they'll never be my nemesis. Yeah, we go too far back since day one, like Genesis.
Speaker 1:Yeah, clear vision like contacts. Catch a contact from these highs. I'm reaching. You. Don't need no Carfax to see my driving mint condition. I flip the channel like Comcast. They listen to me like a podcast. I've been ready to crash out like Flight 11 on the tarmac.
Speaker 1:I feel like Juvie, if I ain't a hot boy, then what do you call that? Yeah, on God, I wish he'd never left us here. On God, I want to be close to God. I need protection here. Feel like he about to make a return every election yeah, murder and corruption and destructive misconceptions yeah, in God we trust. So I don't trust you. Learn my lesson? Yeah, only trusting my instincts and my eyesight and my vision. Clear, visualizing my demons trying to take me exorcisms yeah, I run into them head on like a collision. That's on God. Yeah, and I don't care if this one hurt your feelings. That's on God. Uh, yeah, and I don't care if this one hurt your feelings. That's on God. I don't care if you ain't trying to listen. That's on God. Little fool for thought. I've been improving they nutrition. That's on God. Thank you.