Mastering the Mindset

From Self-Doubt to Success

Darius Dotch

Let's cut it out. The B.S. We're going to talk about how to stop all the  B.S that goes on in your mind that holds you back. We let our mind keep us from taking the action we need to make things happen. How long will you allow this to go on? It's time to turn things around. Let's dive in.

Become a supporter!

Listen To My Music!
YouTube Channel

Make a one time donation?
VENMO
PAYPAL
CASH APP

Need other options? Email me at:
dariusdotch@gmail.com 

Support the show

Become a Supporter!

Speaker 1:

What's up everybody and thank you for listening to Mastering the Mindset. My name is Darius Dodge and I'm an actor, hip-hop artist and fitness and life coach, and I'm here to personally help you train and improve your mindset so that you can, one, become the best version of yourself mentally and, two, gain focus and motivation to be able to take action and achieve the success in life that you want and deserve. Before we get started, please like and subscribe to my channel and at the end of this episode, if you liked it, please share it with a friend or a loved one or someone who would benefit from hearing this message. I'm so glad you're here and I'm ready to go on this journey with you, and that journey begins now. That journey begins now. All right, welcome back to another episode. Thank you for being here. If you are on YouTube, go ahead and like and subscribe to the channel.

Speaker 1:

If you are listening on the podcast platform, please leave me a review. Let's get right to it. Today is going to be a short one, a quick little fire. I want to light under your butt today, but before we jump in, I want to just say, if you want to support the podcast, there's a new way to do it. You can become a monthly supporter and you get to choose the amount. You can either choose three, five, eight or ten dollars a month, and you also get to decide when you stop, and it would be greatly appreciated. It helps me keep this thing going. So please, please, please, support the podcast. I thank you in advance. So let's get it.

Speaker 1:

Let's talk about how to stop all the BS, how to stop all the bush that goes on in your mind all day long and hold you back from creating the life you truly want. And I'm going to give you a tip. That's so simple, so so simple, but my hope is that it's going to help you when you're having these moments, when you notice yourself getting caught up in all the BS and you know, a lot of times we realize that we ain't getting it done. We realize we're not doing the things that are going to lead to creating the life we want to make, and it's simply because of something going on in our brains, our minds, our mindset, whether that's fear, limiting beliefs, procrastination, feeling like we need to be motivated to take action, our self-consciousness, creating some future in our minds that don't even exist or that we're afraid of happening. Then we do nothing, we don't take the action to create the life we want, simply because of the things going on in our mind. So do this real quick Take a second and think about your biggest fear, that thing that's holding you back, holding you back from taking action.

Speaker 1:

Not like a fear of spiders like me or fear of clowns I'm getting better with my fear of spiders, though. We've been beefing, but I'm getting rid of them but not those kind of fears. I'm talking about the kind of fears like the fear of failure, the fear of success, the fear of being embarrassed, the fear of putting yourself out there, the fear of people judging you, the fear that you're not good enough. Guess what? None of any of that is real. None of it's real. And guess what the secret to overcoming it is? You can't. You can't overcome it. Why? Because it doesn't exist. The only thing that you can do is stop paying attention to it, stop letting it stop you. Because it's not real. It only exists in your mind. It's not something tangible, it's not something that you can physically hold in your hand. It ain't something physically hindering you in some way. The only problem is that you have a problem and you created that problem. The only problem is that you have a problem and you created that problem. You created it. So, yeah, it feels real and you might even say it is real. I give you that. I'm sure it is real to you, but it's still only in your head.

Speaker 1:

Take a step back and look at how all those fears you may have are literally only in your head. You can't hold them in your hand. It's not a reality, because we can worry about anything in our head. Right, I can be worried. I can be afraid that a spider is going to crawl in my shoe while I'm asleep and I put my bare foot in and a spider going to bite me. Now I could let that stop me from putting my shoe on, or I could just put the shoe on anyway and understand that, yeah, it could be in there, but if I want to leave the house, I have to put shoes on. So I got to do what I got to do. I don't let the thought of a spider potentially being in my shoe hold me back from leaving the house. Silly example, yes, but you get the point. We shouldn't let those fears hold us back from taking the action towards creating the life we want. The majority of the time, we are the ones that hold us back.

Speaker 1:

All the BS, things like negative thinking, overthinking, imposter syndrome, having the feeling or thought that we don't deserve it, feeling like we're not capable, afraid of not being accepted, not wanting to stand out, feeling like it's too complicated, like it's impossible, and these are all things in our heads. We can't physically hold them. You can't put them in your hand. I can look down at my hand and see my hands. My hands are real, they're right in front of me, but my thoughts? I'm creating them. I'm creating them. And since I am, what does that mean? That means I can create new ones because I'm creating them.

Speaker 1:

Like when folks wake up and they immediately think how they don't want to go to work. They think how they don't want to go through this long ass day. They think about how they don't want to sit through a long ass meeting. They think about that failure they don't want, about this thing, they don't want about that thing. They don't want to happen. When you spend your day like this, how much space are you giving yourself to create from a positive mental space If you only think about the things that you don't want all the time, there ain't no space to think about the things you do want, no space to put towards you creating that future.

Speaker 1:

Because, no matter what, no matter what and hopefully we will still all be here and with the way this country is going, who the hell knows but no matter what, let's say five years from now, you will end up somewhere. You will end up somewhere, and where you are in five years is going to be heavily dependent on what you think about, because that's what determines the actions you take. Yes, some things are going to be out of your control and some circumstances are going to pop up, circumstances out of your control. Things happen, but a large part of it, the largest part of it, of you either being exactly where you are now, the same, worse or better, exponentially ahead of where you are now, exponentially ahead of where you are now, is controlled by your thoughts and the actions you take. You will end up somewhere, and if you don't actively work at trying to be somewhere different, then you won't be anywhere different.

Speaker 1:

Then you won't get the life you want because think about it where you are now, the life you have right now, is a result of all the actions and thoughts from the past, all the things that you did, all the things that you thought about, that led you to do the things or not do the things that got you here. That's what. That's what got you the life you have right now. And if you like where you are, then hell yeah, great job. You took good actions in the past. If you don't like where you are, there's a good chance. The actions you took were bad ones and, yes, circumstances do play a factor in that. But we also can change our circumstances. We can work towards that change at least. And maybe you decided to take the easy route. Maybe you decided not to step outside that comfort zone, because those actions outside your comfort zone are the parts of yourself that you currently don't possess yet, parts of you and where you want to be that you haven't tapped into yet.

Speaker 1:

Again, all the limiting beliefs and the overthinking it's all in your head. That's where it lives, not in reality. It might be real in your head, but it's not real because it ain't here, no-transcript. And here's a suggestion I got for you and you should do this every day, and I do this every day and over time I've been getting better at it. So the moment you start to notice those thoughts, you have those negative ones. What you got to do is talk to yourself out loud as if you're talking to somebody else. Talk to yourself in the moment and you say to yourself that's not true. You say nope, not right now. Or you say nope, that's a lie or no, this is only in your head. You have this quick little conversation with yourself each time and I use my music, for example.

Speaker 1:

So in 2020, I was working on a song and I felt good about it, but I also felt like it was it wasn't one of my strongest songs, like it was just kind of OK. But whatever, it took me a while to write it. Definitely took me a long time to record it and mix it and master it. I tried something different and I had to go through a learning curve. It probably took me about a week, a whole week, to finally get it sounding how I wanted to.

Speaker 1:

And my roommates I always let them hear my music before I release it, especially if it's a song I think is dope, like yeah, I'm for real rocking with this song. Let me let them hear it and see how they react, because I feel this thing go hard. So I let my roommate hear it and he is like a true supporter of my music. He got me in all his playlists. He always talking my music up to other people. He was the main reason I was able to get my music in the show at the Guthrie, which to get your music played on that stage in that building. That's something to really be proud of and really cherish, because the list of folks that can say they have their music feature in the play at the Guthrie that list is short.

Speaker 1:

So we were in rehearsal and we were going on a break and I was working on a song that I let him hear and he was feeling this song, my unreleased song, king Kong Banger, and he was like, hey, hey, dutch man, play that King Kong. Y'all need to hear this song. It's dope. I played it. Everybody in the room was vibing to it, especially the director. The other actors were too. They was feeling it. Then they wanted to hear more and so I played Soul Food, loved it. One of my cast members, my cast mates, she was feeling it so much she was listening with her eyes closed.

Speaker 1:

Long story short, the director was like, yeah, we have to get your music in this show if it's perfect. So rewind back to 2020. I play my roommate this song and the song is called so Alive and, by the way, I'm going to put it at the end of this episode. So I played him a song and he literally didn't say a word. He just listened quietly, nodded his head slightly and when it was over he was just like, yeah, I like it.

Speaker 1:

And usually when you like a song, the reaction is way bigger than that. So I'm like, okay, okay, well, I already don't think it's that good, like it ain't bad. But I already came into it not feeling the best about it, especially since I tried something different on this song and his reaction made me feel like, well, maybe it really ain't good. And what did I do? I had it in my mind that I wasn't even going to release it. I wasn't going to drop the song. It was perfection. It was the perfectionist in me, which I've worked on, of course, but I wasn't going to drop the song.

Speaker 1:

And obviously there's a couple of things wrong with this right, so one I was relying on outside validation. I needed him to react a certain way, to tell me it was good, to give me validation that the music I make is good. And two and the point I'm making here is I needed to have that moment with myself, that talk, because I had so much evidence, so much evidence that the music was good, that people truly are fans of what I do and that I know I'm talented, that you know what I know I'm dope, I know the music I put out is better than a lot of the stuff folks I know got in a playlist right now. I know I run the risk of sounding arrogant by saying that, but I know it's good. I had to have that talk with myself and remind myself that no, that's not true. The song is good. You do make great music.

Speaker 1:

Long story short, I released a song and not only did everybody love it, I got so much good feedback from that song. Released a song and not only did everybody love it, I got so much good feedback from that song and until this day a lot of folks tell me it's their favorite song, including my roommate. It ended up being his favorite song at that time. And here I was telling myself this story in my head. That was just false, but in those moments I just had to keep going. I had to just not let it affect me and understand that this feeling or these thoughts, they ain't real. And I feel like that was a long story.

Speaker 1:

Anyway, my point is talk to yourself. Point out how you're on some BS. Call yourself out, speak to yourself in the now. Talk to yourself. If you have a business and you got that fear of a failing, which is a common fear, talk to yourself, say, ok, the lights are on, I'm not closing down, I'm still operating, I'm doing fine, I'm paying the bills. Call yourself out, remind yourself that there's some future of a failing that you have made up in your mind. Don't allow yourself to accept that. Tell yourself how it will succeed. Bring those facts into your brain, not the imaginary, the true things that are happening around you. The facts the business ain't failing right now. You still have it. The bills are paid. You came a long way. You started, you've been putting in work, you've been taking steps. You are good enough, you can do it.

Speaker 1:

That fear that you have is just in your head. It ain't tangible, but the steps you take, the actions you take, are right now. You're fine. Tell yourself the truth and the things that you want to believe. You got that bill that's due next week. Well, that's next week, it ain't right now, it ain't today. So what can you do in the present moment to get you to a point where you can pay that bill, because worrying ain't going to do it? I wish we could pay bills with worry. All my bills be paid for a couple of years by now. All my goals will be hit if I could pay with procrastination. But unfortunately we can't do that. So realize that you are the person who can be your greatest enemy.

Speaker 1:

Pay attention to what you're thinking, to what you're imagining, to what you're afraid of. Attention to what you're thinking, to what you're imagining, to what you're afraid of, all those negative thoughts. Your thoughts have a lot of weight on the actions you take or don't take, and if your thoughts are full of BS, then what kind of actions, or lack thereof, do you think you're going to take? So that's what I got for you today. Again, please support the podcast by becoming a monthly supporter. You get to choose the amount and you also can decide when you want.

Speaker 1:

The song I got for you today is so Alive, so let's ride out. Yeah, see, I feel so alive right now. You know, baby, you got this frown on your face. It's like listen, you got to get right with yourself before you can get right with anybody else. That ain't game. Marcus Wilson said that. I feel so alive, had to put my little chain on and I felt like getting dressed. So I got fresh. I ain't got no stain on. They want to cut my wings and take my halo. They tried to get me. They came close. Police caught me slipping, got my name in the system. Yeah, I'll be fine.

Speaker 1:

I'm an optimist in my prime. Like optimist, I'm feeling alive. If you ain't feeling my vibe, I don't give a damn. That should be obvious. It's dodge and it's my night. So I flip the switch. I turn on my limelight. I shine bright like the sun, ruin your eyesight, but I can see clearly now, unfortunately from hindsight. But I'll be all right.

Speaker 1:

Yeah, and my bar is always cold as ice cream. Like what would you do for a clunduck? All I wanted was an audience. All she wants is my free time. She don't understand how hard it is. I'm chasing my dreams, baby, so I got to put my all in this. You don't need a cardiologist. You can see I put my heart in this. Ain't nobody going hard as this.

Speaker 1:

I know that when I started this yeah, I pick up this mic, I'm the sickest and I be writing prescriptions it got me feeling like a pharmacist. I do it big, like notorious, and I'm down for whatever baby I'm with chips. Like a toilet lid, you piss me off and get flush. I feel so alive right now, loving your vibe right now. We look so fly right now. Maybe cause I'm high right now. Your body's a blessing. Feel like I'm in heaven, girl, I just died. Right now. I dive in your holy water, but I won't drown right now Cause I feel so alive. I feel so alive. They in my way like TSA, but they will not stop this, cause I'm like a pilot that, yeah, baby, come back to the crib. I don't got cable, but I got hulu. Baby, come netflix and chill with me. Don't lie, keep it real with me. I can tell you feeling me, throw it at me, I will hit it bow. And I feel so alive right now. I'm so high off life right now.

Speaker 1:

Probably shouldn't drive right now and my nigga just came in town. Yeah, we finna go take it down. Yeah, we finna go after clowns. Don't record me. Put your phone down. A cell phone is an eyewitness. That's snitching man. I don't want to be on Facebook or your Snapchat or your Instagram. I can't let this hit the net, acting like it's the Wimbledon.

Speaker 1:

I ain't saying I'm innocent, but I am a businessman and I got an image, yeah, and I got a drink in my hand right now. And I got a finish yeah, and I got a. I'm not really playing like I got a scrimmage. I never hate them niggas cause I'm not a bigot. They might wanna give they two cents. So, guess what? I got a lot of pennies. But so what? I'm already winning. I pulled you and I get a pennie. I make it juicy, you calling me bigot, but that's later on, when I call Uber to take us home. Cause, girl, I feel so alive right now, loving your fly right now, maybe because I'm high. Right now, nobody's a blessing. Feel like I'm in heaven, girl, I just died. Right now I dive in your holy water, but I won't drown right now Because I feel so alive. I feel so alive, yeah.