Mastering the Mindset
Mastering the Mindset
Showing Up For Yourself: 5 Keys
It's time to confront the internal battle between ambition and self-doubt. A lack of self accountability can really be a killer of goals and dreams. Your drive has to be relentless. Consistency and showing up for yourself can build the self-confidence you need to create that life you want and love. Let's talk about turning. Pressure into progress and self-doubt into determination.
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Losing myself and finding my strength, came to the conclusion that I want it all, feeling that pressure of trying to do better. I wanna reach heights, but too scared to fall, too scared to fail. You're way more scared of feeling regret. I'm not even trying. That's terrifying. I understand that. Chasing my goals are burying my clocks because it take time. I gotta go. I already know if I wanna grow, you breathe what you sow. That be the case, planting my seeds and water my base. Yeah, I made mistakes. Yeah, I know you grow in your garden, but watch for the snakes, the people that act like you crazy, but trying this, they fall away. They don't think it's possible. I think it's possible. That is just hate if they hate themselves because they on the shelf.
Speaker 1:Why you create a life that you love, a life that you love Loving the fact you're improving yourself. Decided that you would not settle. Decided that you got the drive to do what the road got. Bumping your foot on the pedal, you go up a level. You turn up whenever it's time for you to go. Put in that work. I know my worth. I know it ain't gonna be easy. Yeah, I know it hurt. One thing is for sure yeah, until they put me in this earth. Before I ride in that hearse, I'm chasing my goals. I'm chasing my goals. Yeah, love and affect you, improving yourself. Decided that you would not settle. Decided that you got the drive to do it, to go, got bumpers in the gutter. I'm chasing my goals.
Speaker 1:All right, and welcome back to another episode. Thank y'all so much for being here. If you are watching me on youtube, please go ahead and like and subscribe to my channel. If you're listening on the podcast platform, please leave me a review. Those help me out greatly. Also, become a supporter of the show. You can choose the amount either $3, $5, $8, or $10. It helps me keep this thing going and I must appreciate it. Let's go ahead and jump in.
Speaker 1:So I am back, as you can see, in the podcast studio. Well, not just a podcast studio, but my guy, bobby. I'm at his studio. I wanted to make an upgrade in 2025. And Bobby put out this social media post that he has a podcast studio set up for folks who want to come and record and I'm like yes, sir, that's just what I needed and the direction I wanted to go in. So here we are.
Speaker 1:Anyway, let's go ahead and dive in, because this is definitely an episode I think everybody can relate to, and especially since it's the beginning of the new year and, of course, we all have those New Year's resolutions and those goals, and a big factor if not the biggest factor if you actually achieve them or not, is if you hold yourself accountable, because we've all been there, done that. When it comes to this right. We've all experienced those times when we know we should be doing something or we know we ain't really doing enough when it comes to the things we want to achieve. We know we should be doing something or doing more, and yet we just don't do it and, as a result of this right, we're not hitting our goals. Day after day, week after week, month after month, we let time go by while we really know deep down we know we just ain't doing enough, that we haven't done all the things that have to be done to actually make things happen. We're not holding ourselves accountable. So what happens when we do this? When we stop showing up for ourselves, we lose confidence in ourselves. For example, if you say you want to start that online business or you want to sell a certain number of products online this month and you're not giving it 100% or you're not making it to work on time, right, if you're not doing the things you know you need to do, you're not going to be building confidence in yourself. Because what we are doing by doing this, by not holding ourselves accountable, we're setting ourselves up for failure.
Speaker 1:And over time, all these little failures add up. We know we should be doing something, should be working on that side hustle, and we don't. And a month goes by and we still haven't started. Failure we have goals at work we want to hit, but we procrastinate and don't put in that extra work. And next thing, we know our goal then came and went and we didn't achieve it. Failure or we want to be able to lift a certain number of pounds in the gym by the end of the year, but we don't really push ourselves in the gym Failure Over time, all these many failures will add up and will cause us to lose confidence in ourselves. We start thinking that we're not capable or we doubt ourselves. We lose confidence right, when the honest truth of the matter is we just haven't been holding ourselves to a standard we should be holding ourselves to.
Speaker 1:But again it's 2025, a new year. Not a new you, but a you that's focused on growth, a you that has made a conscious decision that you're going to end the year better than you were last year, and I'm definitely on that journey with you. I'm trying to do this myself. I'm trying to outdo myself, outdo what I did last year, and I know that in order to do that, I'm going to have to do the work. And I'm trying to outdo myself, outdo what I did last year, and I know that in order to do that, I'm going to have to do the work and I'm going to have to hold myself accountable. So let's get into this five ways to hold yourself accountable. And before I start, let me just say this definitely is one of those episodes where I ain't telling you things that you don't already know. We know this stuff already, but it's good to hear it and be reminded of it. So here we go.
Speaker 1:Number one, and it's such a simple concept, but it's act like it's a job. Act like it's a job. If you act like it's a hobby, it's going to pay off like a hobby. If you start in a business or working towards growth or working towards getting better at something, whatever that thing is, if you treat it like it's a hobby. You'll get hobby rewards from it. So instead of um, so instead of uh. Instead of doing that, treat it like it's a job. Right, whenever you leave the house, right, I'll go to work or go work on it. Or when you set time aside to work at it, when you're planning your time for it, treat it like work.
Speaker 1:Let that put you in a different mindset. Because, think about it If you have to be at work at eight o'clock in the morning, right, you're going to get up at least an hour before you got to be to work, which you really should be doing. If you're not, you're going to shower, eat, meditate, whatever morning routine you have before work. And why do we do this? We need to be ready for work, physically and mentally prepared for the workday. So why don't we use this same mindset for the things we want to do for ourselves? Plan that time accordingly, set aside that time, take away all those opportunities to be distracted. Because if you think about it like a job, right At work, when you're on the clock, do they want you to be on social media? Are they okay with you starting your day 10, 15, 30 minutes late every day? Do they let you clock out after 10 minutes.
Speaker 1:So why not approach those things you want for yourself the same way? You have to take it as serious as a job, especially if it's that side hustle or business or a thing you want to make you to make money for you. Right, if you plan on working on something for five hours, hold yourself accountable like it's work and actually put in all the time you said you would treat it like it's work. Put that time in, which leads to my second point, which is protect your time. And this one can be a little tricky, and the reason why I say that is because the folks in your life might not understand this one at first. So when I say protect your time, what I mean is, for example, if you set time aside for whatever you're working on, especially if it's a business, it can apply to anything, especially if it's a business, it can apply to anything.
Speaker 1:But after you set that time aside and you're working on it, let's say you decide to work on something from 10 to 2, 10 am to 2 pm, and at 11 you get a phone call from your mama and she has a question about something, whatever it is, and that question turns into a 45 minute conversation, or if, at noon, your friend walks in and asks you to look at this funny video online, or if somebody asks you for a favor right in the middle of your work. If you continue to allow all these kinds of distractions and the breaks in your concentration to happen, then you're not holding yourself to that standard that you need to hold yourself to. Because, think about it, if you were at your job let's say you work at the bank, your If you were at your job let's say you work at the bank your mama wouldn't call you and ask. If Aunt Susan called you about the blanket she made you Right. Or if your friend wouldn't come into your job and ask for a ride to the grocery store. No, those things wouldn't happen. Why? Because they know that while you at work, that's your priority.
Speaker 1:Protecting your time is absolutely very important, and the reason it can be tricky is because people that you know might you might have to turn them down, right, you might have to say, hey, look, I know that I'm not in the office. What I'm working at, what I'm working on, is at home, but I need this time to focus on whatever I'm focusing on, because when you're protecting your time, people might not really take it as serious as you do at first, and sometimes you have to put that phone on silent. Sometimes you got to separate yourself. Sometimes you got to go to a quiet place and just work. Sometimes you just have to tell folks no, or not right now, or that you just can't do it until you finish what you're working on. You have to protect that time, because if you don't protect that time, it's way too easy to lose it, and that could be from attention span alone, right, humans in general.
Speaker 1:Over the past two decades, our attention span has gone way down. How long do you think the average attention span is? If you had to guess, and I'll give you a hint, it's less than a minute. If you had to guess, and I'll give you a hint, it's less than a minute, and it's gone down the past two decades. It used to be only 12 seconds, now it's down to 8.25 seconds. 8.25 seconds Less than nine seconds.
Speaker 1:So how important do you think it is to really protect your time? You can lose your attention so fast, especially if your phone is right next to you. I hate it sometimes because I have to work on my phone a lot For editing or for recording or emails, whatever, and I find myself getting distracted so fast by my phone and social media, and that's a whole different study and a whole different episode to break that down. But anyway, protect your time from your phone, from people and from the things you love. Right, people know me, I love to watch football and if you saw my home on Sundays, you would see two TVs in the living room with football on it, my laptop with football on it and my phone with football on it. Right, I'd be locked in, but that can be a distraction. So I make sure that I try and get all my work done before Sunday, because I know that distraction is strong, so throughout the week, so I'm able to relax on Sundays and just watch football after church. I protect my time.
Speaker 1:So how can you make sure you're holding yourself accountable and protect that time? That's number two. Number three is use a calendar and schedule yourself. Now, this is another simple concept in theory, but a very useful one. Are you planning your time accordingly, right? If this thing, that we're working on, this goal, this business, that side hustle, this project, if it's really important, which I know it is, are you giving yourself those dates and planning your time? Do you have those deadlines in place for yourself? And not only should you be scheduling yourself and putting it in your calendar, right, this is kind of like point one, but don't miss it, don't miss it, don't fail to show up for those things in your calendar. If it was an event at work and you had to be there right and it's in your calendar, ain't no way you would miss that. You make sure that you were there, that you show up. And it could be for several things for deadlines for yourself, for progress measurements, like, let's say, I want to have 25 percent of this thing done by the fifth of next month. It could be also used to make certain days be certain tasks, like for me, mondays are my content day. I write on Tuesdays, I write out my podcast, I edit on Wednesdays and I record on Saturdays. How can you use your calendar, make those appointments with yourself, schedule those things, schedule that time in your calendar and stick to it. That's three and four.
Speaker 1:The next tip is don't be busy, be productive, don't be busy, be productive. I say this all the time. Things we know, right. We know this. This is nothing new? Right, I talk about this a lot, but as you put things in your calendar, are you protecting your time and treating it like a job? Right, you have to really understand the difference between being busy and being productive. Are you taking actions? That's going to move the needle forward.
Speaker 1:Researching that's not being productive. Yes, it can be necessary, but you can research for a whole month straight and not take one single action. Right, getting prepared? No, still not productive. You can be. You can get prepared and buy all the things, set the room up, get the lighting right, buy the outfit, buy the equipment but are you any closer? You more prepared to start? Yeah, but you still a step one. So what actions can you take to be productive? To get you closer, what are the things you can check off that list? Those needle moving actions, needle moving actions.
Speaker 1:So that's, that's number four. Don't be busy, be productive. And number five is be surrounded by the right people. You want to surround yourself with those people who are going to hold you to a higher standard than you hold yourself to and I put this on last because I think this might be the hardest one of them all Find those people who have similar goals or a similar mindset as you, those folks who you know, who know your mission and will expect you to show up for yourself, no matter what. For example, I have a friend that I met online on Instagram and she does fitness and has clients like me, and we kind of have this unspoken competition with each other. Whenever she sees me post something clever, or if I announce something new I'm doing, she'll message me and congratulate me, and then the next day or two or next week or whatever I'll see her, I'll see her post something very clever or unique, right, and we kind of let each other motivate ourselves, right? In a sense, we are holding ourselves accountable. Another easy example is, if you're watching me on YouTube right now, right, this is the studio, bobby's studio. He wants to grow his studio and what he's doing, and I want to grow what I'm doing. So here we are both putting in the work, both having that growth mindset. Find those people who can actually hold you accountable.
Speaker 1:It can be tricky, right, because as much as we love our family and our friends, we know that they will always be aligned with our mindset. I can't tell you how many times I know people who say that they want to start working out and they know I'm doing my workout program and they want to potentially sign up. A lot of times it never happens and it's not. I mean, you know, and that's not saying anything bad about them, because I know what it takes to really get in shape, all the time it takes the dedication, the effort, all the hard work and for a lot of people that fitness lifestyle it just ain't for them, and that's OK. Lot of people, that fitness lifestyle it just ain't for them and that's okay. Potentially it could be something for them down the road because over time you can work on that mindset, of course, and change it. But right now for a lot of people they're not in alignment with that kind of mindset and it can be easy to not be motivated to go to the gym if nobody around you is going to the gym on a regular right.
Speaker 1:Another example are you following the Instagram accounts of other folks who are doing similar things to you or things that you want to do? If any of y'all follow me on social media, you know that I'm getting really good at editing and a big reason for that is a lot of the accounts I follow. Their content is editing tips and tricks, and I follow other podcast pages, I follow other motivational pages, so my timeline has so many of the same things that I'm either trying to do or that I'm doing right now. Right, so I see it all the time and it motivates me and it sparks me creatively, right? My point is there is more than one way to surround yourself with the right people. Sometimes it'll have to be online, but that's number five Surround yourself with the right people. So that's it.
Speaker 1:This is a very quick one, quick recap. One act like it's a job and take it just as serious. Two protect your time and hold yourself accountable to that time. Three, use a calendar and schedule yourself. Four, be productive versus being busy and really understand that difference. And five, be surrounded by the right people, and that's it.
Speaker 1:Like I said, straightforward, we didn't learn anything new today, but hopefully you can start to use these tips because accountability is so important. Accountability and discipline you need both and they both affect each other. You can't be disciplined without holding yourself accountable, and if you don't have anything to hold to hold accountable, then you don't have anything to be disciplined for, right? So, yeah, I really want us to hit our goals this year. I really do, and I know they mean a lot to you, otherwise you wouldn't be going after them. So let's do the work. Let's enjoy the work and the process and who we're becoming by going after these goals. But to do that, you're going to have to hold yourself accountable. So let's do that. So that's what I got for you today, as always. Let's ride off to some more music. The song we're going to ride out today is Lemons. Let's ride out.
Speaker 1:No-transcript. I talk about me and what I been through. Then I got hot Like I got the flu. I could be a choreographer Cause I'm making moves. Yeah, I got the moves. I do it so smooth. They know I keep it lit like I made a fuse. Now she wanna hang Like she made a noose. I pray to God. They all seen me when I I keep it lit like I made a fuse. Now she want to hang like she made a noose. I pray to God. They all seen me when I made the noose Was on the SPN, feeling so cool.
Speaker 1:No, I ain't flexing. That's not what I do. I can't get them lessons. Like I said, I chew Because life give me lemons. Now I got to choose. Watch my shoes, these brand new. They want to walk on my steps, but these ain't the shoes. Wait, let me change my shoes because, like I said, these new holla right. When I hang with us better lay some up like we about to hoop. We all take three hope we can shoot.
Speaker 1:And I don't keep up, not with all that gossip. I just sip up out my teacup like I got the flu because life gave me limits, hit me and my feelings. What did I do wrong? What didn't I do? I look in. I'm feeling so different, like what's going on. Is that really you? I don't want attention. I wanna be sipping. I wanna be numb. I don't wanna feel it. I don't wanna hear it. Don't wanna go back and forth, don't wanna play tennis.
Speaker 1:Life gave me limits. I got the juice. I ain't tripping, I stuck. Life gave me limits. I got the juice. Thought I was through. I was so blue I took a leap of faith with no parachute. God gave me wings. That's when I flew. I feel fresh about the rap, bro, feeling brand new. If you only knew what I been through. Don't ever stop grinding, bro. Hope you never do cause when you start climbing up you will love the view, cause life gave me lemons. Now I got to choose what's in a bad mood, still a good dude. I needed doors to open for me. They wouldn't move. Got my foot in the door For me to intrude, cause life gave me lemons. Life gave me lemons. I've given limits but I got the juice. I hit the booth and I tell the truth. I talk about me and what I've been through. Then I get hot like I got the flu, thank you.