You and Imposter Syndrome

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Imposter syndrome shows up when you're trying to level up. You tell yourself that your progress is due to luck, or things that give you an advantage, instead of the actual growth you are experiencing.  It can lead to you to downplaying your wins instead of celebrating the skill you've gained.

We start by breaking down what imposter syndrome actually is, then dig into how it can look in everyday life: fear of failure, fear of regret, and the pressure that comes with bigger opportunities. I share a personal story about being asked to headline a paid Juneteenth performance and how easy it was to credit the moment to who I knew instead of the work I put in, the talent I built, and the support I earned.

From there, we shift into practical mindset work for personal growth and confidence. We talk about controlling your thoughts so they don’t control your actions, expecting the emotional ups and downs because success is not linear, and treating discomfort as proof you’re becoming the next version of yourself. If you’re chasing goals in your career, business, creativity, or health, this one will help you stop self-sabotaging and start owning your progress.

If this helped you, subscribe, leave a review, and share it with someone who needs the reminder that they’re not a fraud.

Transcript

Opening Verse On Chasing Goals

SPEAKER_01 0:00

So stop blaming your failure on other people and other circumstances. Yes, there is a lot in this world that we can't control, but we can control our thoughts, which then drive our behaviors, and behaviors drive action. Losing myself and finding my strength came to the conclusion that I want it all. Feeling that pressure of tryna do better. I wanna reach heights, but too scared to fall. Too scared of failure. Way more scared of feeling regret. I'm not even trying, that's terrifying. I understand that chasing my goals, I bury my clocks because it takes time. I gotta go. I already know if I wanna grow, you greet what you sow. That be the case. Planting my seeds and water my base. Yeah, I made mistakes. Yeah, I know you grow in your garden, but watch for the snakes. The people that act like you're crazy, but trying this, they far away. They don't think it's possible, I think it's possible. That is just hate. They hate themselves, cause they on the shelf. While you create a life that you love.

SPEAKER_00 0:57

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_01 0:59

A life that you love. Loving the fact you improving yourself. Decided that you would not settle. Decided that you got the drive to do it. The road got bumping your foot on the pedal. You go up a level, you turn up whenever it's time for you to go put in that work. I know my worth, huh? I know it ain't gonna be easy, yeah. I know it hurt, but thing is for sure. Yeah. Until it put me in this earth. Before I ride in that hearse, I'm chasing my goals. I'm chasing my goals.

SPEAKER_00 1:31

Loving the fact to improving yourself. Decided that you were not settled, decided that you got the drive to do it to go. Got more put on the cutter. I'm chasing my goals.

Welcome And How To Support

SPEAKER_01 1:41

Alright, and welcome back to another episode. Thank y'all so much for being here. Uh, if you were watching on YouTube, go ahead and like and subscribe to my channel. If you are on a podcast platform, leave me a review. Also, I gave you an easier way to support me. Like I always say, I love coffee. You can buy me a cup of coffee. I left a link in the description of this podcast. Just click on that cup of coffee and you can buy your boy cup of coffee to support me and help me keep this thing going. Let's go ahead and dive in. Today's

What Imposter Syndrome Really Means

SPEAKER_01 2:10

gonna be a real important episode, and I'm glad y'all are here. We're gonna talk about imposter syndrome and in particular with knowing how to navigate that feeling of inability or the feeling of unworthiness. Because that happens from time to time, right? Especially if you're in a season where you are really trying to level up, whether that's in your career or your business or with your relationships, with your health goals, you should actually expect that you're gonna feel some resistance from time to time because you've never done what you're pushing to do right now. So the goal of this episode is to remind you or show you why and how you are capable of making that dream or goal or reality, and that you are capable of making progress in the right direction. So let's dive in and first let me read to you the definition of imposter syndrome. So imposter syndrome is a psychological pattern in which an individual doubts their skills, talents, or accomplishments and has a persistent internalized fear of being exposed as a quote unquote fraud. Despite external evidence of their competence, those experiencing this phenomenon remain convinced that they are frauds and do not deserve all they have achieved. They incorrectly attribute or attribute their success to luck or interpret it as a result of deceiving others into making them into making others think they are more intelligent than they perceive themselves to be. Okay, first of all, okay, that's a lot to unpack. The first time I came across this subject, I really had to look in the mirror. And it's something that I've been working on for a while now, and even still, it still can be a struggle sometimes. And a lot of people struggle with this. Studies show that women especially struggle with this or experience this. People feel like they don't either deserve a certain success for what for whatever reason, or they don't actually call their shot because they're scared it might actually work out and give them a larger burden of responsibilities and expectations placed on them that they think they could actually handle. They think they can't handle all those expectations, or they're scared of other people seeing it not work out for them. Because underneath it all, they can feel like they aren't actually worthy of success or that they don't think they're capable of becoming that person who can achieve those things that they want to achieve. And I hear a lot of people talk like this and tell me if this sounds familiar. They say things like, Oh, well, good for her, but I can never do that. Or, well, she can do it because of XYZ, but I can't do it because I don't have XYZ. They place all these limitations on themselves and justify why they can't do something when they why they're not capable. And the thing is, one, we forget that everybody sucks when they first start something. We do. Like I said a few episodes ago, when I first started writing my hip-hop musical, it was hard. Hard as hell. I felt stuck, I felt stuck a lot. I didn't know what direction I wanted to go in. I felt writer's block a lot. I had so many moments where I would write something and then look at it and be like, man, this shit sounds corny as hell. Ain't nobody gonna be feeling this. But over time I kept going, I kept writing, I kept evolving, I kept pushing myself. And now not only am I almost done with it, but I feel so much better about what I have. I feel like I really have a powerful script and some powerful songs, and I can't wait to see this thing to its completion. Anyway, like I said, one, we forget that everybody sucks at things when they try it for the first time. And two, we can start to feel like imposters when we actually start to see some success in something, and we literally forget that we earned it. For

The Juneteenth Headliner Mind Trap

SPEAKER_01 6:11

example, and I use my performance up in St. Cloud as examples on here a lot, but I learned so much about myself and have so many things that um that relate to what I'm talking about on this podcast. So, if you haven't heard for the last four or five years, I get invited to perform my music up in St. Cloud for Juneteenth. And it's a paid gig. One, it's amazing that it's for Juneteenth, and I get to do my music as part of the city of St. Cloud's celebrating Juneteenth, and I get paid. That's amazing. But the imposter syndrome I had to check myself on was when uh last year when I got to be the headliner. I got asked to be the headliner, which again is amazing. And of course, I was proud of myself and excited and nervous and grateful and all the things. But there was this little voice in my head, it was reminding me that, yeah, you headlining, but you also know the guy who runs the Juneteenth event for the city of St. Cloud. We actually went to college, and my imposter syndrome was telling me that the reason I got that gig was because I knew him. And that's why he chose me. I was downplaying my success, my own success. And I didn't even notice it at first. I was telling folks about it, and the way I would tell them or bring it up to them is I would be like, Yeah, the dude who runs it knows me from college, and so he gave me the opportunity. Or I'll be like, Yeah, I went to school with the guy who runs it, and so he asked me to be the hairliner. And yeah, did we go to school together? Yep, we sure did. But that doesn't take away from all the work I had put in, building up my brand and the support that I get. It doesn't take away from the fact that I have talent, that my music has substance, that I'm the kind of artist that would be chosen to perform for Juneteenth, that would be chosen to headline. Because there are other folks that we went to school with that did music, that do music, people that he knows, and yet he chose me. And I had to check myself on that. I had to remind myself that I was worthy, that I earned it. And that's something a lot of people struggle with. We earn the progress we're making, and then we start to question ourselves and we start to self-sabotage because we've never been at that level before. We tell ourselves it was luck. We tell ourselves that the only reason I'm seeing progress and people are noticing and telling me they see the progress is because it's just family or it's just my best friend. They're supposed to say that. And then other times we just don't know how to handle it yet, right? The success we start to see, we don't have the skills to handle it. So we say things like, I'm just not capable or of this, or I've never gone beyond this point. I don't know if I can actually be better than this than I am right now. And again, a lot of this is in our subconscious, and we don't even recognize that we do it.

Control Thoughts Before They Control You

SPEAKER_01 9:03

And there's so many directions I could take this episode, but I want you to leave this episode with the reminder of how much control you actually have. Because, yes, there is a lot in this world that we can't control, but we can control our thoughts, which then drive our behaviors, and behaviors drive actions. And we can also control how intentional we are with controlling our negative thoughts and calling out our BS when it comes to attaching validation to those negative thoughts, those thoughts about who we are and what capabilities that we have or don't have. And one thing I want us to do, which I think is really, really important, is to not think of this imposter syndrome as a completely negative thing. Yes, is it negative? Of course. But I think it's important for us to realize that the reason we're having these imposter thoughts in our head is because we're trying to go after things we've never done before or we're making progress, and that progress is what's causing this imposter syndrome to pop up. And if you're having these thoughts while you're working towards it, that means that you are literally in the process of leveling up to the next version of you. You have to expect that these thoughts and feelings are going to pop up. We should actually celebrate it because that means that you are actually right where you need to be. You are becoming that person. And the imposter syndrome is getting you on track, getting you closer to where you want to go. It's part of success. Because the fact that you're feeling some imposter syndrome after you've got some of these positive results, or even if you've never even started, those imposter feelings are letting you know that you're looking right in the face of progress. And know that as you're on this journey and you feel like an imposter, or you feel like somebody's gonna find out that you are that you're a quote unquote fraud and that you may not be qualified, know that by you putting in this work and working towards more success, that this is the actual process in real time of you qualifying yourself. And when you feeling like you are not worthy of success, or you feel like you might not be able to handle it when it comes in, question those thoughts. Of course, you don't know if you can handle it yet because you've never been there. How could you understand if you can handle it? You literally are becoming that person right here, right now, every single day that you show up for yourself, every single minute you put in, you are becoming that person that can handle it. And when you begin to ask yourself these questions, it's a very normal human thing to do. That's part of growth, that's part of chasing goals. And like I always say, success is not linear. There's all kinds of twists and turns in a roller coaster, and with those turns, expect the emotions to be a roller coaster too. All kinds of emotions. So, what if you decided to change your thinking around this imposter syndrome? What if you instead of resisting all these negative thoughts and feelings and telling yourself that you're not on the right track or that you're not capable? What if you get to a point mentally when you expect these things to come and say, okay, here it is. This is what I expected. I'm expecting the ups and downs. This is part of the journey. Recognize that you can't have highs without

Expect Highs And Lows With Growth

SPEAKER_01 12:29

the lows. You can't have that excitement and drive without being anxious at some times. They both have to exist. Because this actually means that you are on the right path. It's normal. There's nothing wrong with you. It's just being human, being on a growth journey, dealing with this now will further equip you and will further equip you for dealing with this in the future when you level up and reach even higher levels. Because the reality of it all, this is never gonna go away. It ain't going nowhere. Why? Because you're constantly gonna be leveling up your life, especially if you're the kind of person that's listening to this kind of podcast right now, right? You focused on personal growth. So know this. If you're in a season where you lost and you feel like you don't know what you're doing right now, it doesn't mean that you're lost, it just means that you don't know where you're going yet. The key word is yet. A lot of times stress and anxiety comes from being a human who wants to know it all. Right? We as humans, we want to see this crystal clear path that we can follow step by step. But in reality, newness does not feel balanced. Handling something you've never done before won't feel natural and you won't feel equipped. And elevating to that next level and doing something you've never done before, it ain't always fun. And it feels like you're juggling too much, like you have one foot in quicksand, which is you trying to juggle all the things in your life, and the other foot on solid ground, which represents the old, simple, less complicated life that you used to. And you don't see how you can possibly keep that foot in the quicksand. It feels unstable. But the thing is, it won't feel like that forever. And let me tell you, it won't be because it'll get easier. Like I said, these feelings will come no matter what, but you will get better at managing your perspective and expecting this contrast of feelings, and your toolbox for handling all these thoughts and feelings will grow as well. So when you feel an imposter syndrome and you welcome it and you realize that it's normal, and you don't tell yourself that this this BS story that you're on the wrong path or that you can't do it, and you figure out how to manage that anxiety, you will be building up this mental tool, this mental toolbox for future moments just like this. And another

Build Your Toolbox And Celebrate Wins

SPEAKER_01 14:54

thing, and I have to get better at this my damn self, but along the way, take a moment to clap for yourself a little more because you are doing a lot of hard work to be where you are right now, and you are doing a lot of hard work to get to where you want to go. Look at those reasons to congratulate yourself on why you are seeing success. When you feel this imposter syndrome, take some time to remind yourself that you're gracious, you're a good person, and you've been working your ass off to get to where you want to go or to get to where you are now. And hell yes, you deserve this success that you're seeing. Hell yes, you qualified, you're qualifying yourself right now as we speak. You're putting in that work right now to become that woman or to become that man who deserves that success. The success you've had, the success you will get if you keep going. Because you will keep going. And be proud of the progress you're making. And remember, an imposter is someone who pretends to be somebody else. An imposter is somebody who pretends to be somebody else. But you can't be an imposter if you just be you. If you are becoming who you are becoming, right? So keep showing up, keep taking it one day at a time, keep reminding yourself that it's not always gonna be easy, and as a matter of fact, you don't want it to be easy because when have you ever been proud of yourself for taking the easy route? The easy route won't show you what you truly are capable of. So, from me to you, you got this. Keep going. Yes, you are, yes, you can. So that's what I got for y'all today. Uh,

Closing Message And Listener Challenge

SPEAKER_01 16:35

please go ahead and support your boy by buying me a cup of coffee. Also, share this uh episode with someone who you think will benefit from this. Make sure you tag me in it. Uh, let's go ahead and get to this music. The

Outro Song King Kong

SPEAKER_01 16:46

song I got for y'all today is King Kong. Let's ride out. I got it, I got it, don't like the bed, like, don't make me beat my comment, I don't get the best, you only get one life, give your best, don't be great, don't be red, pick up the plate, don't be test, don't be rest, don't be fair, look at the I'm gonna put it on the kit, yeah. I don't want the beast, not a pet, or like a fit, like, please don't get to bug in bed, please don't beat the pit, don't be like, I mean, it's a bug and bit of it, just a top and make it on the flesh, and no one beat, be called, don't make me have to flip, beat, okay, I'm not in the mess. I use it, just love to me, like a bluff to me, do it in the middle, you can be able to buff with me, but people above the meeting, people to me, like I'm under the death. I don't see no test with this pen and this pan, and I think I'm right being correct. They can say whatever they want, but they gotta give me respect. People love to see you down, I don't let it get me upset. I don't care if you talk down, go ahead and get it off with your test. Oh, you hate. I just treat it like a plus one in my deck. Y'all gon' make me drop my fist and we'll let this bar talk about everything I touch on fire, yeah. You actin' like I'm lit. The bar told the imposter stupid, be gonna play, they know what beat. Don't make me put it on.